Never thought that would happen!
by theoneandonly100
Summary: this is a storie where ryou has no control over bakura and cant cope for much longer. malik is trying to get yami to go out with him aswell, but yami hates his guts! yaoi!
1. Default Chapter

                     Don't let me get me

Ok. This is something totally different than what I usually do. It's Ryou who can't cope with Bakura. He's just a total nuisance to everyone. Ryou just can't handle it anymore! This is also a 'Malik trying to get Yami' thing Yaoi! Ryou X Yugi 

'Peoples thoughts' 

Ryou, for once, was resting. He had just been to the police to get Bakura back, and the ex-tomb robber was now out somewhere with Malik. Bakura had robbed several banks yesterday, but was let off when he sent several people to the shadow realm at the threat of a prison sentence. 

Ryou never knew where Bakura was. He couldn't ever do anything to stop him. The albino sighed. _Why can't I have a Yami like Yugi's?_ Yami always let Yugi know where he was. He always promised that he wouldn't do anything cataclysmic and he stuck by it. Ryou decided to go over to Yugi's. He picked up a coat and left. 

On his way there, Ryou saw Bakura in the street, running in-between cars with Malik for the soul purpose of seeing how angry they could make the drivers. 

"Don't do that!" he yelled. Bakura looked at him and laughed. 

"Like you can really tell me what to do!" he yelled back. Malik started laughing too and stuck his two fingers up at Ryou. Ryou scowled and left them alone. 

He carried on up to Yugi's house and knocked on the door once. Yugi opened the door and flung himself at Ryou.

"Hi angel!" he said happily, leading him in and slamming the door. Yami was sitting in the living room yelling all the right answers at a quiz program on TV and mocking all the people who got them wrong.  

"How could that stupid moron think that the answer was Barcelona? He's a real thick shit!" Yugi rolled his eyes and sat down next to him. "Oh hi Ryou." Yami added, glancing up at him and smiling before turning back to the TV. 

"Hi. I just came over for something to do. Bakura's annoying car drivers with Malik." Ryou sat down and stared at the TV, not really seeing anything. He sighed and slipped into his own world. 

"I'm going to get Bakura." Yami whispered. He got up quietly and headed to the door. Yugi grinned excitedly and ran to the window to watch. He saw Yami go up to Bakura and Malik, beat the crap out of Malik, hit Bakura across the back and drag him back towards the door, unconscious. Yugi laughed and Ryou jolted out of his own world. 

"What's so funny?" he asked frowning.

"Yami just went and 'got' Bakura!" Ryou's eyes widened.

"How much bodily harm did he do?" 

"Just a hell of a lot to Malik." Yugi assured him, turning back to the window in time to see Malik limp away cursing. 

Yami walked swiftly in and dumped Bakura on the floor. 

"What did you _do_?" Ryou asked, looking at his unconscious yami. 

"Just knocked him out." Yami said, sitting back down infront of the TV and hurling the right answers at it again. 

They heard a loud shriek outside and a furious banging on the front door. Yugi opened it and Malik darted in, slamming the door shut and gasping for air.

"What's with you?" Yugi asked.

"DEATH IS FOLLOWING ME!" he yelled. Yugi sighed and walked past him into the living room. 

"Yami? Death is following Malik again." Yami looked up slightly, not really caring that much.

"I didn't beat him up that much." He said defensively. Malik came in glaring straight at Yami. 

"Didn't beat me that much? You beat the life out of me! Death is following me again and it's your entire fault! I'm staying here until death gets bored! You know death needs an invitation in!"  

"That's a vampire." Yugi said from behind him. Ryou smirked.

"Same difference!" Malik insisted. "I'm staying put, and no one is leaving this house!" 

"You're not the boss of me!" Yami snarled. He stood up and backed Malik into a corner. "You get back to your own house 'cause this isn't a hotel!" 

"I don't have a house and you know it!" Malik retorted, glowering at Yami. 

"Let him stay for a while Yami! It's funny watching you two fight!" Yugi pleaded. The pharaoh stared at Yugi for a while before rolling his eyes and sighing in defeat.

"He'd better stay out of my way." 

Three days later and Malik still hadn't gone. He was driving Yami slowly crazy, following him everywhere. Bakura was making prank phone calls to Australia, costing Yugi hundreds of pounds he didn't have. 

"I'm so sorry." Ryou kept saying.

"Don't you have any control over him?" Yugi asked, frustrated and tired. He hadn't slept for three days because Malik kept walking round outside his bedroom door in small circles. 

~Flashback~

Yugi woke up at about one o'clock in the morning, hearing loud footsteps outside the door. He opened his bedroom door and saw Malik walking around in a small circle, wearing a groove in the carpet.

"What are you doing?" he asked, still half asleep and far too tired to bother sounding angry.

"I'm making sure that death doesn't get me." Malik answered. 

He refused to stop and told no one how going round in circles was supposed to keep death away from you.

~End Flashback~

"I'm so sorry… but no." Ryou said, sighing and glancing at Bakura, who was duelling with Malik. 

"I WIN!" Malik shouted suddenly. "Hey pharaoh I'm as good as you!" Yami glared at him.

"No one is as good as me." He muttered, walking away from him before he had to kill Malik. 

"You cheated!" Bakura snapped, gathering his cards and leaving in the opposite direction. Malik looked over to Yugi and Ryou.

"Hey Ryou? Piss off somewhere for a while. I need to talk to mini-pharaoh." Ryou reluctantly walked off in the same direction as Bakura, leaving Yugi and Malik alone. 

"What do you want?" Yugi asked warily. 

"Yami." Malik said shortly. Yugi grasped his puzzle.

"NO!" Malik rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Not like that you moron. I _want Yami." The light dawned in Yugi's head. He stared at Malik like he had grown an extra head._

"Oh my god. That's so freaky." Malik glared at him. "I mean…um, it's very… unnoticeable." 

"Mm yes. But I want him now. I can't pretend anymore. Death stopped following me a while ago, but I stayed to be near Yami." 

"Yeah. He said you were following him around like a very aggravating shadow." 

"Whatever. Look I want you to get him to like me." Yugi raised his eyebrow. 

"I can't _make_ him like you. I'll tell him for you if you want." Malik thought for a while. 

"Ok then. But make sure I'm not here when you do it. Just encase he doesn't like the idea and decides to kill me." 

The next morning, Malik woke up feeling apprehensive. He went downstairs quietly and saw Yugi and Yami already up. Yami glared at him and marched out of the room. 

"Did you tell him?" Malik asked, walking up to Yugi.

"No." Malik's face fell. "I got you a date." 

"WHAT?!" 

"I. Got. You. a. Date." Yugi said slowly. "With Yami. He's taking you to the cinema."

"How'd you get him to do that?" 

"Don't ask." 

~Flashback~

"Yami?" Yami looked up to Yugi. They were the only ones left I the living room and it was about eleven o'clock at night. 

"Yes?"

"You know Malik?"

"Unfortunately." 

"Will you take him to the cinemas tomorrow?" Yami scowled.

"Why should I?" 

"Maybe if he gets out of the house for a while, he'll realise death isn't following him." 

"Why me?" Yugi couldn't think of an answer to that, so he just rolled his eyes and gave Yami a 'that should be obvious' look. 

~End flashback~

"Just go with him tonight ok?" Malik nodded enthusiastically and sped off to get ready. "What's he getting ready now for? He's got like… ten hours…" Yugi said to himself.

                (O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O) ^_____^ (O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)(O)

First chapter up and done! Tell me what you think and if the story's worth continuing. I have to get back to my other stories now. SEE YA!


	2. WORLD WIDE NOTICE OF EVICTION!

WORLD WIDE NOTICE!!! 

CAN EVERYONE SEE THIS? 

TESTING TESTING: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!

Ok. I'd just like to say that my computer is being taken away. But donnot fear! I am going to go on to my friend Buzz's account with her and post my fanfics there! So I'll be moving all my fanfictions over there! Please review my stories again once I'm over there, and add our new joint account to you favourites list. So I can finally convince Buzz that I _do _infact have friends. 

Whilst there I will act as a muse to her, and vice-versa! Behold the wonder! 

The desired affect is that she will develop her love for funny fics and I'll get a bit more serious! I'll be trying to do a serious yugioh fic soon, and we will both be working on a yugioh DBZ crossover! 

This message will be on here for a week, and then I'll transfer my fics over to Buzz's account. Hopefully I'll get her to change the name of her account too.

Ok, just a message to everyone:

Sorry I haven't updated in so incredibly long, but family stuff. Ya knows da stuff. 


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